Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling.

Forgiveness is not one of my strongest suits. I know I shouldn’t carry grudges, but it’s so difficult to let go of my grief at times. I’ve always believed that the only way to fully forgive someone was to forget what they had done to me. But how could I possible forget some of the wrongs done to me? Some pains are simply so difficult to let go of. And some people are simply impossible to trust again.

Forgiveness might be difficult at times.

Yet it is so necessary. “I love you” and “I’m sorry” are the two most significant words somebody can say to their partner. Any connection requires forgiveness.

But it might be difficult to forgive and forget at times. Is this a sign that your relationship is bound to fail?

How do you forgive someone when you’re not in the mood?

How do you forgive your lover while still in pain? Can you forgive your partner while still in pain? Do you want to know what the answer is? Can you figure out the answer? Would you believe me if I told you the answer is yes?

Yes, you can forgive someone even if you don’t want to.

You can forgive someone even if you are still in pain.

You may forgive while also remembering.

You are not required to act as if it never happened. Forgiveness does not imply allowing yourself to be harmed again and over again. Because forgiveness is not a sensation, you can forgive others while their sentiments are still raw and terrible. It’s a decision.

We must make the decision to forgive others.

We must make the conscious decision to forgive someone who has injured us. No matter how we feel, we always have the ability to forgive another person. And if forgiveness is a choice, then all of Jesus’ teachings on forgiveness become a little more feasible (though it’s still difficult, especially when you don’t want to forgive someone).

Jesus would never tell us to do anything we couldn’t do. If He says we shall be forgiven in proportion to how much we forgive others, He means it. When He says we must forgive seventy times seven, He means it. That’s a lot of forgiving, but as He says, with God, anything is possible. This includes forgiving someone while remaining grieving. When I am injured by someone, whether it is my partner, a friend, a child, or even a stranger, I remind myself that forgiveness is a choice.

Even when the hurt is still unbearable, I can choose to forgive.

It’s not always easy, but as Christ Himself tells us, “with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26).

Forgiveness is a choice we must make for ourselves, but God makes that choice possible. Even if we don’t feel like forgiving someone, we can ask God for the grace to do so regardless.

And what if you don’t want to beg God for forgiveness? Ask Him to assist you in wanting to ask Him. All things are possible with God, and He can soften even the hardest heart, including the one that refuses to forgive.

 

 

 

7 Narcissistic Signs in Your Partner

Most of us have had at least one toxic relationship in our lives. And you might be in one right now if you’re reading this.

Narcissists are risky people to fall in love with. They deceive you into falling in love with them, and then once you’re theirs, they lie, degrade you, emotionally abuse you, and blame you when the relationship fails. Worse, many of us end up attempting to repair the relationship, doing anything we can to make the narcissist happy again. It’s a downhill spiral that nearly always ends in heartbreak.

This form of codependent relationship, in which you desperately need them and they need you to meet their demands, can be extremely harmful to your mental health. You begin to doubt your own worth, your self-esteem plummets, and you may become isolated, alone, and even melancholy.

Heartbreak can make you feel vulnerable, and your friends and family may not understand your perspective. They only perceive a bad connection that you should end immediately. I’ve been there before, and I even started hiding my troubles from my family and friends because they didn’t seem to understand or want to hear about it any longer.

Talking to someone who understands can be quite beneficial. Because there are times when you truly need more assistance!

How Can Therapy Assist?

Sometimes you require more than your best friend’s advise. A counsellor can assist you in sorting through your difficulties, identifying the true causes, and devising a solution. It offers you the assurance you need to make the best decision for you!

How can you tell if you’re dating a narcissist?

What Exactly Is A Narcissist?

Narcissists are stereotyped as domineering, vain, egotistical perfectionists who must always be right. However, just because your partner enjoys taking selfies and is self-confident or competitive does not imply that they are a narcissist.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a medical disease that can have far-reaching consequences for people around them. We hear the term narcissist a lot these days, but what does it truly mean?

NPD is more than just a big ego and selfies. It is characterized by an exaggerated and false sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy for others, and an overwhelming desire for attention and adoration. These characteristics make it difficult to be in a loving, healthy relationship.

Why Do You Fall For A Narcissist?

During the honeymoon phase, the evil villain… I mean narcissist will put on a show, making you believe you have met the perfect mate.

However, subtle red flags start to appear- unreasonable demands, outbursts of rage when things don’t go their way, and insults at your self-esteem. We usually ignore them at first, hoping that it’s simply a terrible day or a poor mood that will pass.

Before you know it, you’ve been cut off from your friends and have no one to turn to for aid or counsel… at least no one who understands.

You begin to question if you are the problem in the relationship. Things would be better if you just kept things cleaner, started working out, or made him happier, as they were in the beginning. Things will never go better if you’re dating a narcissist. Even once the relationship is over, it might take time to recover from the emotional trauma.

Life isn’t a fairy tale. Without the scary smiles, wicked music, and dark attire, the evil villain could easily pass for your Prince Charming.

In the honeymoon phase, narcissists excel at playing the caring, supportive partner. When things go wrong, you’re blinded and left thinking it’s your fault.But the truth is that you can never completely satisfy a narcissist. They are, in some ways, impossible to live with, deal with, and love! It is frequent to come across folks who have narcissistic personality disorder. Discover the key symptoms of this condition.

Quickly Recognize A Narcissist

Narcissistic men and women are so self-absorbed that they perceive their friends and lovers as simple extensions of themselves. They are fascinated with flattery and expect to be admired and to be the center of attention at all times.

Unfortunately, these narcissistic personalities are usually quite alluring, causing you to fall in love with them without even recognizing it. Because their egos are so fragile, they are continually seeking attention, putting their partner at risk of losing the relationship or friendship. Narcissistic people, whether friends or love partners, are harmful.

Want to instantly recognize a narcissist? Here are some questions to consider:
  •  Does he or she lose interest when not the focus of attention?
  • Are most talks about them, regardless of whether you try to change the subject?
  • Is your partner constantly looking for compliments?
  • Do they literally come apart when you criticize them, especially if it is about their appearance or mistakes?
  • Do you hear them talking about all of their purported ‘lost loves or ex-friends,’ each of whom seemed to have big defects that caused him or her to break up with them?
  • Do they get angry or throw temper tantrums if they don’t get special treatment or constant attention? Are they irritated, for example, if they are not served quickly enough in restaurants or do not get the finest seats at the movies?
  • Do you notice a pattern in which this person uses people to acquire what they want and then discards them after their own needs are met?

If the man or woman you’re interested in exhibits any of these habits, you should be cautious. These are not the folks with whom you should enter into a relationship if you want equal attention and love.

Below is a more in-depth examination of what narcissism is.

7 Narcissistic Signs Your Partner Is

Consider the following facts about exhibitionist narcissists and determine if someone in your life fits the bill:

What exactly is a narcissist? It’s a person with an inflated ego and a grandiose picture of themselves.

A narcissist is like other kinds of narcissists. They typically have low self-esteem and may not have a caring atmosphere at home. They frequently compensate for this by exaggerating their sense of self.

Narcissists have a strong sense of entitlement. The focus of attention. Narcissists must always be the focus of attention. They want the entire universe to revolve around them. And when it doesn’t, they’re irritated and outraged. They crave attention and actively seek it. They want to be loved and praised by everyone. They are not at ease sharing the spotlight with friends or family members. They are easily envious if they are not the center of attention.

Empathy is lacking. Narcissists have no understanding of how others feel. They are unable to relate to them and frequently disregard them.Although narcissists are capable of experiencing upset, they are unaware that they are hurting others. They can only see their own sensations and are unconcerned about how others feel. Narcissists are often self-centered. They expect the world to accommodate their wants and requirements. They are impatient and want everything right away. They don’t mind if their wishes cause problems for others.

Expecting the best. The majority of narcissists demand perfection from others around them. They have unreasonable expectations and exceptionally high standards. They also believe that they are faultless and convincing a narcissist that they have made a mistake is impossible. They impose their standards on others and refuse to live in reality. The narcissist also needs to project perfection. They will go to tremendous efforts to persuade others that they are flawless. They’ll spend hours retouching images, cleaning their homes, or shopping for new items. They’ll lie if it means convincing someone that they’re perfect.

Narcissists frequently share romanticized photographs and stories about their lives on the internet. Making use of others. Because Narcissists don’t care about other people, they can easily manipulate them. In some circumstances, family members will be used as props. They frequently regard individuals as objects. They assume they are simple to replace or swap. Narcissists can make family and friends feel like props. Because narcissists must be the center of attention at all times, they will push others aside to achieve their goals.

Because they do not see others as equals, narcissists struggle to return affection. There are no apologies or acceptability. Even if they recognize they have done something wrong, exhibitionist narcissists are unable to apologize. They refuse to accept responsibility for their acts.
They refuse to admit when they are mistaken. You can wait forever for them to apologize, but you won’t get one. Admitting a blunder would be a crushing blow to their egos. It is easier for them to act as if nothing is wrong. It’s easier to ignore problems indefinitely and let others to suffer because, once again, they don’t care.

It’s simpler to identify a narcissist if you’ve learned the warning flags. You may learn to recognize these warning signals and use this knowledge to avoid narcissists, especially in partnerships! However, if you believe you are already in a relationship with one, there is help!